Assemble

Wow. What a night. The BIG night. FIGHT NIGHT!

The entire world at this point knows their names. Tonight, when it was their turn, they came out in their lavish outfits that probably didn’t need to have so much flare. They each had their own theme song as they were introduced. Logos and tag lines and catchphrases abound. A hero and a villain. And Reznor knew most of them.

Of course, I mean The Avengers. They Assembled in San Diego. And Rez smiled the entire time.

Tonight, instead of watching a boxer who has never lost fight a boxer who has never boxed, Becky and I took Reznor to a cheesy, yet very impressive, stage show featuring some of the men and women he most looked up to in the world.

And that smile he had when Captain America came out will forever be remembered by this proud father.

Around the same time this fight was happening, the most embarrassing sport of all the sports was going on. Friggin boxing. I don’t know why we haven’t learned our lesson. These fights NEVER meet our expectations.

Maybe it’s cause we’ve seen so many movies about boxers. Men and women overcoming the odds. I picked a random year, 2001, and I did some homework. We’ve had a boxing movie come out every year, except 2014:
2001 – Ali, 2002 – Undisputed, 2003 – Undefeated, 2004 – Million Dollar Baby, 2005 – Cinderella Man, 2006 – Rocky Balboa, 2007 – The Hammer, 2008 – Fight Night, 2009 – Tyson, 2010 – The Fighter, 2011 – Warrior, 2012 – The Boxing Girls of Kabul, 2013 – Grudge Match, 2015 – Creed, 2016 – Bleed For This.

We are saturated with these filmed and choreographed fights constantly. Except these are good fights. So we think we think when we buy these $100 PPV packages that we are going to witness something incredible. We want the end of Rocky IV, and we get Mayweather vs McGregor.

And we’ve been burned so many times. When Mayweather danced around Pacquiao for 12 rounds that was the end of boxing for me. That killed boxing. And this exhibition sprinkled dirt on its grave.

I watched a stunt show that had punches and pyro and motorcycles, and my son was mesmerized. He wanted to sit on my lap while Cap, Ironman, and Hulk went after Loki and the Green Goblin. His face was so incredible. He walked out of the Arena yelling “I am Groot!” and still laughing about when Hulk Smashed Loki and “but him in jail forever”.

(My absolute favorite part of the night was this: Reznor only knows the Sports Arena as the place where the Gulls play, so he asked where the ice was. I told him it was underneath the stage, staying cold for hockey season. Well, about half way through the show, Thor is taken captive and goes down these stairs and out of sight. Reznor was concerned he would slip on the ice.)

I’m bummed I missed a buddy’s birthday (shoutout to Zach!) but I wouldn’t replace the memories with Rez tonight for anything. I’m glad I streamed rounds 2-10 on the internet and didn’t pay a dime to these guys. (Although more homework has revealed that Mayweather made almost $60k per SECOND of fighting, so I’m sure my Benjamin isn’t really making a difference).

Sorry, boxing, and congratulations, UFC. You have my full attention. And even though your guy lost tonight, I still think you’re the real winner.

Nope. Scratch that. #iwon

#assemble

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